Meeting racism, sexism or other forms of conditional despise, hatred or disrespect with a rejection of the person only perpetuates the momentum of violence in a different form. Do you really believe that you can eradicate darkness by denying it your light?

As long as we don’t recognise ourselves in the other, we do not yet understand. And without understanding, we remain powerless to recognise and bring out the intrinsic beauty of ourselves and others; to encourage a genuine kindness that comes from the heart, rather than forging a mask of niceness out of the fear of guilt and shame.

The only way to get rid of racism, sexism, or any ‘ism’ we don’t want, is by recognising it in ourselves, forgiving ourselves and realising:

I see where it comes from and I’m lucky to be able to live a fulfilling life without having to hide behind the illusion of separateness.

Hating or condemning the whatever-ist is the holding on of the same pattern  or energy  of separateness. The pattern of separateness consists of distancing ourselves  first of all  from those parts of ourselves we wish we didn’t have and — consequently  distancing ourselves from others when we perceive those same tendencies in them.

What we resist persists and what we hold on to is what we bring out in our interaction with others, allowing it to perpetuate and multiply. Perhaps not all the time, but at least where our energy matters the most:

The guilt-based mask of niceness breaks down where genuine compassion and understanding matter the most: The edge between your unique perspective and rest of humanity’s diversity  the frontier of human progress.

We’re all human, and we all have our moments of perceived separateness in which we’re a host to ideas of wrongness, rejection, aggression, or other forms of inner and outer violence. Perhaps we even need those moments from time to time, to remind us of the miracle of love. Trying to eradicate violence within only makes it stronger.

Violence feeds on rejection because the illusion of separateness is its cause, its purpose and — if you buy into it — its justification.

Even without being able to do anything about it when you get disconnected from love and peace, you can already massively boost your impact on the world by simply recognising your energy in the moment. To tweak your timing of reaching out to those who triggered strong feelings in you a bit more towards those precious moments when you are connected with peace and inclusive thinking again.

The miracle of love is when the light of recognition and compassionate understanding unexpectedly dissolves what appeared to stand between us.

Nobody has to be perfect. Expecting yourself to be peaceful and understanding with others all the time is just a recipe for disconnect, intolerance, and depression.

However, in between expecting or giving up, there’s a vast space of self empowerment called willingness.


Illustration credits: Face with shadowTree in front of SunRock climber